Exhausting Anxiety, the Met Gala & Facebook Marketplace
There’s a version of anxiety we don’t talk about enough.
Not the racing thoughts. Not the 3:00 a.m. ceiling-staring. Not the jittery, over-caffeinated energy.
The other one.
The heavy one. The foggy one. The “why am I so tired but can’t actually rest?” one. The kind where everything feels vaguely overwhelming, and instead of lighting a fire under you, it just makes you want to lie down.
If you’ve been feeling that lately — you’re not imagining it. And you’re definitely not alone.
🩺 First, it’s real and physiological
A lot of us were taught to recognize anxiety as intensity, but it can also show up as depletion.
When you’re anxious, your body releases stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol to help you respond to a perceived threat—even if you’re just sitting at your desk.
But it can’t stay in that heightened state forever. Eventually, your system downshifts to conserve energy leaving you feeling drained, foggy, and depleted.
You’re still anxious. It just doesn’t look like it.
If you’ve been feeling this way, it’s not a personal failure. It’s a very human nervous system response to ::gestures broadly::
🔍 How to spot it
This version of anxiety is sneaky because it disguises itself as burnout, laziness, or even mild illness.
A few tells:
You’re tired, but not satisfied by sleep. You rest, but don’t feel better.
You’re avoiding things that matter to you — not out of apathy, but rather a quiet sense of overwhelm.
Your brain feels “offline.” Simple decisions feel harder or push you to tears. Focus slips quickly.
Your body feels heavy or sluggish. Even small tasks feel like they require disproportionate effort.
You keep thinking “I just need a reset” — but nothing quite does it.
If this sounds familiar, there’s power in naming it and giving yourself grace. This isn’t a motivation problem; it’s anxiety wearing a different outfit.
🛠️ What to do about it
You don’t fix this by forcing yourself into peak productivity. That usually backfires. The move here is to work with your nervous system, not against it.
🎚️ Lower the bar (strategically)
Pick one meaningful task and define the smallest possible version of it.
Not: “Write the proposal.” → Instead: “Open the doc and write high-level bullets of what you want to include.”
Momentum matters more than volume when you feel this way.
👉 Nudge yourself into motion
Your system is already overwhelmed — adding urgency makes it shut down more. Instead, take an active break to reset. Try:
A short walk outside
Music that gives you an energy lift (optional: solo dance party 🕺)
A 5-minute “just start” timer
🏷️ Name what’s actually underneath
Sometimes the fog lifts a bit when you get specific. Ask yourself: “What, exactly, is making me feel unsettled right now?”
Even if the answer is “a lot of things,” list them out.
Putting language to that swirl in our minds often makes us realize that the problem is not as big or complex as it felt. It’s like looking under the bed and realizing there are no monsters—just some dust bunnies that need cleaning.
🏆 Build in visible wins
When everything feels heavy, your brain needs proof that movement is possible.
Create quick, finishable loops: ✔️ Send the email. ✔️ Outline the idea. ✔️ Make the appointment. ✔️ Finish one small task.
Then acknowledge it. Don’t just move the goalpost.
🪫 Protect your energy
When you’re feeling this way, it’s not the time to overschedule yourself into exhaustion. Instead:
Say no faster
Shorten meetings
Push non-essential work
Take a break to do something that brings you joy
That’s not falling behind. That’s staying functional, and it pays off long-term.
In closing, if you’ve been feeling tired, foggy, and a little off while also carrying a low hum of stress, there’s a good chance your nervous system is trying to protect you, not sabotage you.
You don’t need to “snap out of it” (you probably can’t, and that’s okay). You need to meet yourself where you are and move forward from there — one small, intentional step at a time.
Need to be in the company of some womxn who are right there with you? Our next Work With Day is tomorrow!
🪢 Laura & Lauren
A quick note: while this kind of anxiety response is common, it can overlap with things like burnout, depression, or other health concerns. If this feeling is sticking around or significantly impacting your day-to-day life, it’s worth talking to a qualified professional.
And if that’s something you’re navigating, you don’t have to do it alone—we have some wonderful therapists in this community, and we’d be genuinely happy to connect you. Just reply to this email - it can be as simple as “therapist please.”
Things We Loved This Week
LaurA’s Things
💕 May goals.
✨ This Met Gala look and also this one.
Lauren’s Things
🪲 I too have embraced sad girl spring (but I still think Stick Season is Noah Kahan’s best song).
💐 It’s officially birthday month, so I treated myself with these affordable flowers and I love the little bouquet that showed up with my groceries.
🛏️ I’m just gonna say it: better surprise ending than The Sixth Sense.
